Lately I’ve been experiencing only two moods manic af or too depressed to function.
Today/yesterday I spent most of the day feeling awful especially when I had to go to the doctors for a referral to private therapy.
I was so down and low on energy all I wanted to do was sleep and I didn’t know how to answer the doc’s question coherently (I probably sounded a bit rude, my bad)
I had a nap when I returned home and when I woke up my mood had changed to manic/hysteria I felt like smiling and laughing for no reason but they were hollow and not sincere cheeriness.
I still felt tired but my brain was too wired to sleep so I spent the night/early morning eating whatever I could find while pacing around the room. I feel a bit sick now.
I’m not sure if I would say that this is the worst I’ve ever been I mean as I’ve grown I guess my depression and disorder affects me differently as my personality changes. I’m not so fearful about this breakdown as I was last year I guess now I’m just confused and fed up with everything.