DepressionDiaries: When Things are Good so I get too ahead of Myself

Things have been good lately but that doesn’t necessarily mean good with me when I feel that things are great and I feel energised and productive. I make plans to rush back into work or college and produce a lot of my ideas. 

Things is there seems to be no moderation when I’m like this it’s like I’m manic (maybe I am) what I’ve learned from past experience with this kind of phase is that it can be a sign I’m heading for a breakdown.

This could be where I “glitch” and go back to old bad habits such as self harm and/or have a panic attack or end up taking a trip to A&E because of really bad intrusive thoughts/ suicidal ideation.

So for me is it better to be this happy if it results in a breakdown or am I better off staying apatheticically depressed where I don’t function productively?

Note: I drafted this post a few weeks ago but forgot about it. So I’m publishing it today. Things have been the usual way. Moods up and down,  difficulty sleeping and I had a panic attack recently but that’s about it.

NI2M ❤

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