Today after being promised an appointment months ago I finally got to see the psychology team for an assessment.
It was a very difficult session as of course we had to talk about my history including things I find hard to talk about such as my intrusive thoughts and trauma both of which I’ve been trying to keep out of my mind especially the stuff that’s happened recently but the psychologist wanted to know how I ended up being admitted to a psychiatric ward honestly I couldn’t remember the details probably due to detachment/disassociation or something like that, I kept having to try and remember what I wrote on my blog at the time.
When the psychologist asked me what I thought I needed help with I answered fairly easily that I need to work on my relationship with others as keeping friends and getting along with people are things I definitely struggle with.
They’re going to discuss putting me in group therapy which will hopefully help with my interpersonal relationship skills and I’ve been referred to ACE,a service that provides activities for the mentally ill who have a lot of spare time so that should help keep me entertained now that I’ve left college…Again.
After the hour of talking to the psychologist about school, family, friends and everything while she took notes and the student psychologist observed I felt emotional and sick because I had to resurface the memories I wanted to forget and discuss my dark inner thoughts which I had been very reluctant to do but at least I did talk about them. For a while I was down but after grabbing some lunch and doing some Christmas shopping for my parents I did brighten up. Now I just feel drained and dearly want to sleep so I think that’s what I will do now.