I’m one of those people that find it easy to make friends but really difficult to keep them. I find it hard to tell who genuinely cares about me and who is just using me. I often end up doing so much for a friend and getting so little in return that I feel like I’m being used.
Problem with me is I would do whatever it takes to keep a friend because I want to be liked, unfortunately that means I get walked all over a lot. I often feel like I have to hide my mental state in order to be liked and not judged. This comes from years of being bullied leading to insecurities in relationships with my peers.
I’ve stopped talking to some people that I once called my friends because I realised they didn’t actually care about me.
Friendship is a tricky business, you have to balance your needs and your friends and friends can be lost so easily making the effort just not worth it. Which is why I spend a lot of time alone
I have some good friendships that have worked out, its not that personal though we don’t share deep dark secrets or anything but actually I think I like it like that because we can have a laugh and a good time whenever we see each other and not get too deep.
song of the day: Pretty Hurts by Beyoncé